Cuthbert's new hipsters

Tittmus calls Alan unnatural


This week the 440 yard race was competition for the Bill Phipps Cup. 
Tony Cuthbert showed 'unnatural improvement' and swam a minute and a half faster than the previous 440 yard races this year.
The handicapper Alan Tittmus, was not impressed!

Tony's response to these allegations of race fixing was that "due to a lifetime's over-use of his hips, both had to be replaced. Unfortunately during the race, a Japanese passer-by tuned into Radio 4, this sent the hips
into spasm which resulted in a burst of uncharacteristic speed".

Anyhow, it should be known that the report was by Nick Adams, who has never won the Bridge to Bridge (Cuthbert has).